All Clear!

I had my 3-month oncology appointment. My CEA marker was low, an indication that I am cancer free. A friend who had a clean colonoscopy and CT and PET scan, has a high and increasing CEA. (People can have colon cancer with a low CEA - meaning the marker is not indicative of cancer for them, but current knowledge is that a high CEA means cancer is present.) In my friend's situation, the high CEA might mean that the cancer is there, but the symptoms are sub clinical. Continued monitoring will be needed. It brings me back to that place of being afraid of relapse. I guess that is something that is just always with you.

Reclaiming Oneself

A six week, group therapy session has started for cancer survivors. The first session was yesterday. The woman facilitating the group is good. She has a soft voice and is good at keeping the group going and interested. At first, I thought I would get bored, but the 2.5 hours passed quickly. Today we introduced ourselves and gave our cancer history. Several people were colon cancer survivors. Several were dealing with relapse and it was scary for all of us.

Job Remorse

Prior to cancer, I was conflictive about what I wanted in a job. I would often think about going back to school. During chemo, I wanted my life to be "normal" and took a parttime job. By the end of chemo, I was very tired and dropped the position. I have not worked since. My activities have become focused on the cancer. I applied for a job on Craig's List and in a few weeks found a position, well almost. The offer process got quite confused, such as being given an offer that wasn't signed or a verbal description of benefits which was not correct. I was conflictive about working fulltime and the process didn't help. It didn't bring out the best in my potential manager, either, so in the end there wasn't a match. More on their end, than mine, as I had settled into thinking I would start and if it didn't work out, I could quit. Not a good way to approach a new adventure, but that's where I was. It was good to interview and talk with people that were focused on something other than health and cancer. Now that it's not going to happen, I feel whistful that it didn't work out, yet I don't have the energy to apply for something else. I

I'm about half way through the memoir writing class and I enjoy it. I think being successful in writing a book is a combination of having a story that is compelling to someone, as well as being reasonably well-written. I don't think one has to be a great writer. From the class, I look forward each week to some people's work. The writing needs to be at a certain level, but its really the story that is being shared that connects me.

Survivorship Conference

On Saturday, September 29, went to a survivorship conference, but just getting around to posting now. There seems to be an increase emphasis on helping post-chemo/cancer survivors. One session I attended was on exercise. Exercise was defined as physical activity that is planned and is repetitive movement. The building blocks of exercise are aerobic, resistance, balance, and stretching. The cells of the body need exercise, just as they need food and oxygen. Activity tolerance is defined as how much exercise one can do.